Dating is Hell

…and I've already heard Satan's pick up line

Fetishism – Part 2

I didn’t think I’d actually have to have part two of this topic, but here we are.  The first picture you are about to see is a message that was sent to a fellow traveler of the online dating pot-hole ridden highway.

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Now, I LOL like crazy when I first read this.  I mean, a disobedient avocado?  That must be a joke.  But the more I’m on these dating sites, the more I’m starting to think that this could actually be a serious message and a serious fetish.  People who REALLY like vegetables.  You couldn’t call them vegetarians, because that term is already taken.  Using the term “veggies” would be like using the term “plushies” but I think that would cause way too much confusion.  A guy could ask a girl if she likes veggies and next thing you know he gets slapped in the face and has no idea why.  I’d do some research, but I’m actually terrified of what I might find.  That and of someone finding “sex with vegetables” in my browser history.

Online dating has really been educational for me in this fetish realm.  I get more messages about fetishes and get matched up with fetishists more than I ever dreamed I would.  Hmmm… what does that say about me, do you think?  Although, talking with other ladies who’ve done the online dating thing, I’m not the only one.  So I choose to think I don’t have a “Fetishes Wanted” look about me.  Anyway, next fetish please!

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Yikes!  How does that become a fetish?  I can see the connection to oral fixation but I just don’t understand how any of that can be pleasurable.  I HATE going to the dentist.  I still go every 6 months like a good, responsible adult but I still HATE it.  The buzzing, the vibration… Oh.  Wait.  I think I get it now.  But there is still the scraping.  And the prodding… Ok, I get it again.  Or maybe people who are into the whole dentist scenario have never actually had to have major dental work because we’re talking serious pain here.  Not like, smack me on the ass, stinging pain.  Like, nerve pain shooting into my skull making me want to cry and vomit all at the same time.  So what do we call these hot-for-dentist people then?  Toothers?  Teethies?  I feel like I’m naming things that could have been gifts at the baby shower I attended yesterday.  Oooh!  How about “flossers”?  Oh yeah.  “Floss me, baby!!!”

Let’s see how many days/weeks/months it takes before I need to have “Fetishism – Part 3” posted…

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